Today I had my nails done and looked into the meaning of life. At the same time! This is the miracle of modern technology, specifically the iPhone, which I discovered is much better than old copies of People when my hands are trapped under the nail dryer, a bit of modern technology I have my doubts about. Does it really matter if you use it rather than just wait 15...

Valentine’s Day is tricky. Take my heart-shaped meatloaf (You should only be so lucky). This year, it turned out rather free form, and the tomatoes and parsley could only disguise it so much. And yet. I needed a photo for the blog, having neglected to write anything else for the big day. Well, the photo session with my beloved didn’t go all that well....

It’s Not Nice To Be So Nice You know how you always hear that the man who went beserk and shot his wife and dog was “such a nice guy.” And that the mail sorter who went postal was “always so helpful” and “never got angry.” Well, they’ll never be able to say that about me. Or you, if you’re smart. Let’s face...

  Auntie Pasta is pissed. And you’d be too, if your nickname was Auntie Pasta and you read the piece in Friday’s Times about the “Vigil-Aunties” of Pakistan. These are the “older, bossy and often judgmental women” who go around breaking up couples who are behaving in an “immoral” manner in public places. VIGIL-AUNTIES!...

For root canal yet. I know, I know. If you actually go to the dentist, rather than simply ignore your teeth until they decay and rot away in your mouth, it means that you’re not a total coward. That’s what my nice dentist says. But I don’t believe a word of it. Not even the “ands” and the “thes.” I am so terrified that I...

Well, sorta. Hostess Brands, maker of Twinkies and assorted other highly addictive, no nutritional value nonfoods, filed for bankruptcy last week, throwing some of us into a not-so-mild panic. Bye, Bye Sugar High What? No Twinkies? Not to mention Sno Balls, Ding Dongs, Suzie Qs, or Ho Hos. And worst of all for me, who doesn’t really like any of the...