Picture this: Yours truly going mano a mano with two armed security guards in the Emergency Room at New York Hospital. Here’s how it went down: My husband, who, unlike me, is pretty stoic about pain, was in serious pain. We managed to get to the Emergency Room, and harder still, get admitted inside, where he was put on a gurney in a hallway and pretty...

Detectives of Law & Order, listen up! I need to hire you, ASAP, to search my apartment. Not for clues or incriminating evidence, although that depends on how you define “incriminating,”but to find all the things Missing In Inaction (MII) that I will never see again—unless you help. Think about it, folks. On L&O, they find everything! When they...

“80% of success is just showing up.”  — Woody Allen Agreed. But should we give our highest  praise for just showing up? Shouldn’t we save that for the other 20%: showing up with something truly outstanding? Take Broadway. Please. A pet peeve of mine and many another cranky critic is the standing ovation, which every show seems to get,...

And now, the eagerly-anticipated award for “The Slowest Bus In the Universe” (drum roll please) goes to . . . The 23rd Street Crosstown in Manhattan!!!! Accepting this award for the (Sic) Transit Authority is Pat Fortunato, your friendly neighborhood blogger and frequent rider on this I-could- walk-faster-but-who’s got-the-energy mode of so-called...

Admit it. There’s something illegal you really, really want to do. You don’t do it because you’d probably go to jail, your mother told you it was wrong, you’d probably go to jail, it would be immoral, you’d probably go to jail, it would be bad for your karma, and you’d probably go to jail. You do the crime, you do the time. And...

You think you do -— but you really don’t know what a princess is. Yes, a princess is fussy, needs frequent manicures, likes cute cocktail napkins, and never, ever takes the first seat she’s offered in a restaurant. But a true princess is also the one who leads the charge (usually metaphorically) when her kingdom is in peril. A princess takes care of her...

“For free, take; for buy, waste time.” So said Arthur Godfrey, a popular TV show personality back in the 50s and the inspiration for the ego-maniacal “Lonesome” Rhodes (Andy Griffith) in the classic film A Face in the Crowd. And while the wisdom of “The Old Redhead” is more than questionable (the man played the ukulele, for...

I have this mountain of work piled up on my desk, but my horoscope says: “Sit back and watch the world go by today.” Hmm. As an Aquarius, I tend to take these things seriously. So what’s a girl to do? The horoscope adds that even though the sun is about to leave my birth sign (oh no!), I should not try to “cram in as much extra work as...